Sunday, August 9, 2015

Rob: Escape from Suburbia

The scene opens on our intrepid anti-hero, Snake Plissken err, I mean Rob Carew, staring east in the morning sun. He's about to go for his regular Saturday run and looks wistfully at his little corner of suburbia.

A hazy, long ago memory is sparked in his suburbanite brain. It's one of late nights and wild parties. A time before diapers, before mortgage payments and even before Suburbia.

Our anti-hero adjusts his eye patch, err sunglasses, as he sets out for his "mandatory" daily dose of healthy exercise as per the rules:

While every suburb is slightly different, they all have rules that are strictly enforced by roving gangs of baby stroller toting parents and the even more vicious dog walking retirees.

As he runs past row upon row of box houses, distinguishable from each other only to the expert eye, a plan is starting to form. Perhaps it's possible to escape from Subrubia? If he's willing to face the challenges and push himself to the limit, maybe, just maybe a temporary reprieve from the barren suburban landscape might just be possible.

While he knows that this is the life he's chosen for himself and he's happy with his little plot of picket fence, with grit, determination and just a smidgen of luck, he senses an opportunity to break free for one night. 

Run completed, children fed and happily sedated by the hypnotic power of morning cartoons, our anti-hero accesses his electronic network. It's going to require a crack team of like-minded, hard nosed suburbanites, all focused on the prize to pull this plan off.

Tasks are assigned: 

Alpha Couple are tasked with recon and research. What's hot in the urban landscape, but not so hot that the escapees can't blend into the crowd.

Beta Couple are tasked with transportation. Find a vehicle large enough to transport the group safely into and out of the urban jungle. 

Gamma Couple are are focused on planning and coordination along with Delta Couple.

Our anti-hero's leading lady draws the short straw and must somehow secure replacement parental supervision for the children. It's the most critical task and the foundation for the entire plan. Failure is not an option.

Operation Escape From Suburbia in motion, our protagonist, determined to avoid detection, sets out to complete the regular Saturday tasks. A trip to the department store for supplies, laundry and mowing the lawn lull his fellow suburbanites into a false sense of security. 

Suddenly crisis strikes! The faithful family pet has been stricken with an injury that's left the house in total disarray and it looks like child care might have fallen through. It's looking bleak for our intrepid main character. 

The clock is ticking and the appointed hour creeps ever closer.  The Beta, Gamma and Delta Couples are sent ahead while the anti-hero and his leading lady desperately search for solutions.

Just when everything seems lost and all hope is gone, the dog's health miraculously improves and arrangements are made to drop the kids off in neutral territory on the border of suburbia.

After so many twists and turns our fearless anti-hero and his leading lady are able to make their escape from suburbia. At least for one night. 

But what's this: A ski weekend without the kids. Sequel anyone?

PR Collaboration:


  1. I love your storytelling style. Keep it up because I'm totally hooked now! #anythinggoes

    1. Thank you so much. I'm glad you like it.

  2. Love it! The things you have to do for a night out! looking forward to hearing about your escape for the ski trip :)
    Thanks for linking up to #AnythingGoes

    1. Thanks Debbie. It's so true. Once we've set our minds on going out, there's no turning back. It'll be a few months before the ski trip escape but there's definitely going to be a sequel.

  3. This is hilarious! I love how you turned a night out into a story. #AnythingGoes


    1. Thanks Kristen. I was going to write post about our night out but the escape was really the craziest part of the day.

  4. All hail the victorious anti-hero! One day I might plan a little escape myself.


    1. Do it. It's so worth it to get a little break.